His eyes

As he held my hand, i felt Him.
As he looked into my eyes, i felt Him.
As he spoke, i felt Him.

confession. i killed somebody few days ago Everytime whevener i stepped into the confessional room or even just sitting outside waiting for my turn, the feeling of ,'urgh... so embarassingla wanna tell all my sins.I'm a bad girl! >.< ' is always there. But just now, I was so calm... no nervous-ness or whatsoever. =D One thing that i've ,in a way, learnt today while going for confession is that there is no need to fear or be embarass about, although we may be confessing to a priest but truth behind it is that we're actually facing Him in the confessional room. Just like the story of the Prodigal Son. His father accepted him back although he rebelled against him before. [ okay, now i sound as if i'm preaching. teehee...] Well, I'm just glad and relieved that I skipped my tuition tonight and went for it. OH OH! after exams, i've decided that I'll......................... love addmaths love chemistry love english love bahasa malaysia love physics love maths love moral and most of all, LOVE sejarah. ♥ Let the world be filled with love. ♥ ~To do something or to succeed at something, you have to love doing it~ [not sure how true is this but i'm gonna do an experiment on this.] ~Changing your face isn't gonna make any difference but Facing the change is gonna make so much difference~ -unknown.

ttfn~

Bad day go away, come again ...eh no,if can, never come again.

I have no idea why but today seems like a bad day i've ever had in a long time. Some may call it ..hmm... 'ahh,its normal' . But for others, who knows me, bad days are like once in a blue moon. For goodness sakes, i don't even feel like smiling right now. gahhh..
This morning when I reached school, everything was still okay. Then, going through the day, so many stuffs has been bothering my head. [to Jocelyn and Joan, i'm sorry you both had to see me being so the EMO today. gosh]
I'll name a few that happen. It all started when a teacher came into my class and called me out. Then, she told me the funds money were all gone. ALL 1K plus gone except rm61 ringgit. [YES, that time my heart crushed and my head started to hurt a lot. And and, i just felt so hopeless.] Before that, which was last saturday, I had already passed the money to the teacher who was suppose to be in-charge of the club. I HAD witness. And so, everyone told me it wasn't my fault. But how can i not help to feel that it was all my fault that it's gone. TOTALLY GONE. I felt so depressed that I could'nt concentrate much today especially with so much mixture of feelings. Guilt, Sad, Angry, Depress and all negative energy filling inside me. BUT, i stayed back today to go see the teachers and they told me, they found where the money is already. I felt soo RELIEVED. GOSH! what a day right?
Even while receiving Sejarah paper today, I was soo soo [no need to mention la.heh.inside story.]
To make things worse, these pair of guys behind me was getting on to my nerves. They talk and talk and talk non-stop. [probably because I was so disturbed that I realize that they're really irritating in some ways.] However, thank God I was still in my cool mode. OH OH, and just now, during tuition, I just keep looking at the time, hoping to get home as soon as possible cause I just totally can't concentrate. See how little stuff can affect my mind. sheessshh, i hate it when that happens. 2 hours of tuition wasted....but i did do my work though. (=

I guess, bad days come and go and same goes with happy days. Gah, i just wish all these hadn't happen at once in a day. IT's KILLING ME to handle it all at a time. Then again, people say things don't just happen because it happen, it happen cause there is a reason behind it. =/
Well then, I guess I really need strength from above to keep strong.
It's kinda late now to actually blog but I'm still not feeling better. So, I thought i'd pour out everything in here. Not everything la but most of it.
One thing that I love bout blogs, papers, journal, diary[not that i keep one] or whatever, is that I can write whatever, whenever,whoever I want in there and just throw all my crappyness in it. AND NOBODY willl say a thing back. Maybe there is but who cares. Its my page, and it's all mine. And you know, it actually works to make myself feel lighter and smilier again.
Just a little story to share with my dear blog here,
when I was still a kid, i STILL am now
I used to write all my problems or my day in school or even at home.
For example, I got scolded by my parents. And so, I'd write it on a piece of paper all that i want to say or wish to say it out loud but i can't. After that, I'd re-read what I wrote and tear it all into small pieces. Mind you, IT FELT REALLY GOOD! and I wasn't angry that much anymore. As I grew, I started keeping a journal [NOT a diary] and I'd write down about friends or complain about loads of stuff in it.

Whoa, I did not even realized that i've typed so much in here... hehe

:)
Whatever happens, I'll stay strong. Whatever happens, I'll just close my eyes and tell myself, *starts singing Bob Marley's song* 'Don't worry about a thing, cos' every little thing is gonna be alright...'

Goodnight bloggy~
til then.