counting down

5 more days ~

MERRY CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEAR!

it's official

hoorahhh!!! I, now declare myself as an official school leaver. Bible knowledge paper was goood!At least, I think I did well. :)

Today marks the day
that I wear that old blue dress.
With my hair tied up in a ponytail;

and walking through that rocky pathway.

Time.

surely does past by so quickly.

The smell of thin air, of that old wooden tables and chairs.

After exactly five years being there,

maybe not entirely at the same place..

different backgrounds and cultures,

but both brings that kind of the same adventure- ones I would never forget.

tata

flashback to november

NOVEMBER!

Supposingly MY month. ;) BUT as you all know, spm... *pffft...spoiler!*
Then again, it wasn't all bad. Dad and mum brought the whole family for a japanese dinner during my bday and it was goood...

My mum and her little act for the night.

I can tell you, the food was awesome... absolutely mesmerising.

Moving on, my preparation for exams..

maths? yesss

It's those words that I see nearly every morning when I sit at the patio and it's those words that gives me an assurance in all that I do.

At the end of the day, I find that spm or any other exams aren't everything. Yes, I may need to work hard and achieve the very best but it all comes down to whether I really want to do it.

"its not how good you are, it's how good you want to be."- Paul Arden.

Some say, SPM is just the beginning. Soon, I'll find out how true that is.

DECEMBER!!


everyone knows, it's the holiday season and well, celebrating HIS birthday - my lover,friend and saviour, Jesus. :)
Nevertheless, this year's Christmas season is coming so fast. I sooo miss caroling. Thinking of the joyous moments and singing carols from one house to another, looking at those smiling faces,laughters and so much more. ahh, the thought.

then again, december just started . . .

helloooooo

Sooo, spm nearly over... now what?
Never thought of how it's going to be but now that i'm finally reaching this point of a life where decisions, both good and bad is bound to be made, I have no idea what step to take next. [Dad in heaven, bless me!]

phewwwwww

I don't want to think about the papers. It frustrates me just thinking of how many careless mistakes i've made. It frustrates me more that only the last few seconds before handing in my paper, then I remember certain things but as soon as I wanted to erase my answers, RINGGG!! too late. As the saying of a peribahasa goes,'nasi sudah menjadi bubur.' Direct translate, 'rice has become porridge.'
Indeed, if you ask me how was spm? I'd say it has been going well. How well? Hard to say. For now, lets just all sit back,relax and wait for the nerve-wrecking day, next year.

It has really been a while since I've written anything in here. I'm a bit shaky for now to type and I'll update more, hopefully. *blow dusts off blog* :D

My holiday list:

• get through with violin and bible knowledge exam.
• go swim.
• find a part-time job. [a kindy teacher, perhaps?teehee]
• sing.
• dance.
• movie-marathon.
  
• go someplace quiet.
• write a song.
  
• hang out with grandma.
• do something extraordinary
  

etc...

I'm in a race with myself. Though there is so much that I have in mind to do a lot of things and to get it done as fast as I can, I know I couldn't posssibly be able to do it all in a, I'd say a short period of time because these things that I want to do would take a whole lifetime to accomplish. That also means, it takes commitment and patience. Starting today, I am challenging myself to accomplish just what I want to achieve and to do it without regrets.

Treat your coins right

coins....


Often, I'd see coins in the drain, in the toilet bowl, on the floor, hmmm.. where else?Where's the justice for coins? Doesn't a coin mean any value? 5 cents,10 cents, 20 cents, you name it... They all have value. Come to think of it, wouldn't it be great if ...let's say,one bowl of one of our kuching's famous dish, LAKSA costs just about 50 cents or less? =)
Anyway, the other day, I realised just how much we can collect coins,in at least a year. My mum decided to clear some coins out from our vase of coins. [yes, we put our coins in a vase.] And guess what, we've collected about RM500 plus. It's quite a lot for coins. So, treat your coins right~

Last month, our school's ycs had an outing, held at my mum's village! ....it was AWESOME. You can tell by all those smiles in the pictures below... Had a lot of planning and it was all worth it.

our ex mr and miss president :)

YCS greenians doing the chicken dance

Well, there you have it. It's outing like this that gives so much laughter and friendship although it was only a day.
As the saying goes, we only appreciate things that remain shortly but do we appreciate things in the long run?

Tata~

smilin' to my ears

I'm back! for now....

goshh,i miss blogging. Back few weeks ago, I've nearly run out of excuses for reasons to blog.. when suddenly it hit me that blogging is one or another, connecting. YES, a form of a modern communication. OH, talk about blogging, my english essay paper last week was about 'The advantage of blogging as communication'. Not to toot my own horns but I THINK I wrote it quite well. I have problem with one thing and one thing only.. TIME.
Somehow, there's always not enough time for me to finish before time. In fact, there is but I need improve on time management. any suggestions? feel free to drop me an e-mail. ;D

I'm now officially done with mock ONE! Next up, MOCK TWO. *imexciteeed!*

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

i'll update more soon! Tata!

On writing essays

I NEED ideas, inspiration, creative storyline to write story essays! Gahh... Especially during exams. I really need to be able to think of points spontaniously. I've noticed that all this while whether or not during exams, I've ONLY been writing facts. Facts,facts and more facts. Frequently, I'd always play it safe and not try different topics. Anyway, as i was googling around, I found this... I think it does help, a bit. =)

click here, IF and only if you're up for reading~ or here!

Tick tock tick tock... gosh. Its nearly coming to the end of the year. Everytime, .... YES, EVERYTIME when it's the second semester of school, time go by extra fast, considering there are LOADS to do as well. I have to say my schedule is really pack towards the end of the year ESPECIALLY this year. My bloggy, I just might abandon you again... Then again, to all you readers out there [if there are any], if you see me around, feel free to hit me on my shoulders and say, 'WEI! Update your blog!'

ma teachas are really drillin us form 5's, at the same time, killin' us from the inside.

I have the sudden urge to do this right now....

• I am really,seriously freaking out!
• FREAK out!!
• I am scared.
• S
• C
• A
• R
• E
• D
• People say it's one in a lifetime thing and I MUST get it right or it'll affect everything.
• S
• T
• R
• E
• S
• S
• N
• E
• S
• S
  
• think i'm gonna be sick.
• late-nights
• early mornings
• Homeworks,homeworks
  
• moree homeworks...

• and all that I can list down,which I am not going to do it.

Looking on the brighter side of things~

• YAY!!
  
• I am soo excited!
• I am finally going to go through what others have.
• I am going to do good.
• I am soo healthy, I can fly!
• early nights
• still, early mornings
• homeworks, homeworks... ALL done!
• I can do this!
  

[things can go smoothly and easy if you want it to be; after all, whoever says life is easy? - unknown]

I am His creation, and I am made perfect in his eyes.

Last week, my English teacher,Mdm Theresa, out of randomness told the whole class about this article that she read. It goes a bit like this,
Once, in this particular town, there was this priest. He's always in the church and have been wanting to go out and see the town. Then, one day, since a priest at that time weren't allowed to be seen outside of church, a driver was assigned to drive him around. And, off they went. While in the car, the priest was enjoying himself but that wasn't enough. After that, he asked the driver if he could drive the car. But, the driver resisted because he might lose his job if he do so. However, the priest insisted. Since, the driver realised that there was no one around who could find out, so he let the priest to drive while him, sitting at the back seat. Then, off they went again only this time, the priest is driving. The priest havn't been driving for quite a long time since he became a priest. And so, he was actually driving past the limits. Few minutes later, a police car came and started chasing them behind. After that, the priest had to pull over. When the police went to check and saw the priest, they quickly made a phone call to the headquarters, saying that they have an urgent report.
Then, the officer on the other line answered,' yes, what is it?'
The police replied,'This is very urgent. We can't give a ticket to this driver because there is someone important inside.'
The officer answered again,'hmm...the president?'
'No, its not.' said the police.
'A celebrity?' asked the officer.
'No,sir, its not.' replied the police.
'A priest?' asked the officer again.
'No, someone more important! I think its God because a priest is driving in front.'

At that point, the whole class burst into laughters because the ending wasn't a predictable one.

during wco :)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A week ago, I discovered something interesting! ...at least to me,that is.. My siblings and I were hungry for eggs and well, we found this after cracking few eggs... one of it has TWO yolks! which means TWINS! haha.See those two small ones there?

by the way, those eggs were yumm... ;)


TaTa

sweet sunday

During evening mass yesterday at St.Peter, it was GREAT! Havn't been experiencing so much joy in mass for quite sometime. Well, probably cause I havn't been able to pay close attention while the usual mass is going on. YES, i admit I don't. Anyway, Fr. Terriburke [if that's how his name is spelt. >.< pardon me.] was celebrating the mass. While he was giving his sermon, it striked me of all the things that he mentioned. It goes a bit like this,

There was a woman who went for confession few weeks ago.. She came in and well, confessed. One of the things that she said was, '..... I havn't been going to mass because I had to undergo a surgery.'
I understand that she had missed a mass in that week because of her illness but i think, it is rather unneccesary to confess about that. Why? Take for example, a guy come up to a priest and say,'I'm sorry I did not go for mass because I had to help bring one of my relatives to the hospital.' When you think about it, what that guy actually mean is that he is sorry that he was forced to miss mass because he was doing a good deed. Now, something here has gone wrong somewhere.
Since when is doing good, BAD? right?
Often, we all think that we need to be good in all the things that we do in order to be accepted by others. Thing is, what does it mean by being a good girl or a good boy?

And there was another thing that Fr.Terriburke mentioned as well. It's about the story of the Jewish man who was travelling and the good samaritan. As you know, Jewish and Samaritans do not exactly see eye to eye with each other. But in here, it shows that the Samaritan is willing to help no matter what the condition is. In fact, the Samaritan had a choice to just walk away.[Actual text in Luke 10:29-37]

Is it about pleasing others? or being true to yourself and to God? or being good not because you are force to?

And so, i'll leave it all to you to decide, my dear friends . . .

I guess, not being able to pay attention during mass is something that I fail to do most of the time. Therefore, going to mass every week doesn't make me good but a zombie church go-er.

okay, it has been a while since I updated my blog, isnt it? and it has been a while that I update my blog with pictures, right? SO..... i'm just gonna 're-wind' the past few weeks and probably just mention one or two things that i'm going to be busy within weeks to come.

Some kid in the village. I took this cause this looks kinda authentic, no? =D
granny enjoy playing the gong ;)
Some ritual thingy by the elders of the kampong
nana after the whole trip...Personally, I love this picture. She looked so happy with all the people visiting her house.

I just LOVE taking photos with my brotha!

rice in bamboo sticks,which are best known as 'lemang'During the gawai, my mum did not really celebrated it though but we did went visiting and all.. goshh THE FOOD! Unfortunately, i did not take photos of it. Know why? Cause i was tooo busy enjoying it..
Gosh...Lately, i hate the connection problem.. It has affect me, both physically and mentally. Then again, OH WELL :D

Due to connection problem, I'll re-post those other pictures in here again. [Goshh i need help using dslr and knowing the certain 'techniques'. I was told there are certain angle that needs to be this and that way to get the picture perfect moments.]
Like this? >>>

Somehow, I wish those pictures that I took can move like those in the 'Harry Potter' movies.
Would'nt it be cool, right?

Oh oh! Did I mention? I FELL at school that day. So embarassing! aikss >.<>
Ever since school started after the 3 weeks holiday, my schedule has been, practically packed. Assignments here and there. BUT thank GOD, it's all over now.... whats' left? SIVIKS! gotta do some 'pameran' thing about traditional food. crappy right? i know... =.= Can't wait to get it over with. Lately, not to flatter myself or anything but I have the sudden urge to study, as in doing revision til late at night even. Yes, that doesn't sound like me at all. However, as people say, 'To do something for the better of your life, you ought to sacrifice.'

Halfway round the world, that won't stop me from loving you~

Been a while since I listened to this. I remember I used to listen to this about 7 or 8 years ago and for the fact that I'm listening to it again now, it brings back so much memories and its more meaningful. Ah... good old times.

Tata~!

sunshine

As soon as the morning dew
..and flashes of glimmering light between the skies;
Beyond the infinite of probability;
At dawn,she'd open her eyes..
Just hoping to see that sunshine,
Of which she knows never fail to stop shining..
As the sun ray flows in through the tiny holes of the window,
Rubbing her eyes she did;
In her thoughts,
Of which led to an introspecting state of mind;
Absolutely nothing can ever visualies such remedy..
nor can anyone or anything subsides that.
Looking out into the sky..
...and down...
Knowing how far;
Way up, nearly taking reality into a dream
Of which she hopes to stay awake if only she could, the day before.
Nonetheless, one day after another,
reality remains reality.
She couldn't hold still.

Then, what if the dark cloud hovering the very reason of total freedom?
what if the rain falls?
On the contrary, she needn't not worry.
'For tomorrow has enough worries of its own.'

Taking a deep breath . . .

Stepping out into the bright morning sunlight,
Cool breeze blew below her feet;
Right there.
Exactly right there, where she stands;
marks the beginning of a new gift.

...Of which she knew she'd be back,
Not counting the days or the time;
But to look forward til it comes.

♥ i know its soon but all this while i know i've got a great gift, just awaiting to be discovered.

judgement.

Seriously, judging another person can really hurt them. Though, that person might say they're okay but deep down, it's a different story. True, that sometimes it's just a 'no offence' joke but nonetheless, it leaves a mark. Everything that we say or do, does, in fact leaves sort of a stain in us. Many a times, we know it's wrong but along the way, we tend to forget and endlessly repeating it over and over again. 'It's human nature to judge.' you might say. But change can be done. Hard as it may seem, impossible is definitely not the word.

This happened around early last year. I once asked somebody how to spell a particular word, and she replied me, 'I-D-ten-T'. It took me quite a while to understand what she meant while everyone else was happily laughing away, either at what she said or my expression. When I finally got it, I was then straightaway labelled as naive. =.= I'm so not. At least not JUST because of that, right? right? Maybe im just a slow minded person[ i know but it takes a while for my brain to interpret it.] or maybe i am but who cares! It's not all the time,isn't it? Technically, i'm not saying myself in this but i'm just voicing out.. After all, it's a free country. At least, I think it is. Anyway, there are some judgement done by others towards other people that are... bad.
To cut things short, TRY not to judge, please? or else.... [advise to myself as well] =D

Tata~

silent love

run.........

It may mean running away from something. It may also mean chasing after something. Or perhaps running the distance. But I like it better to think that this particular word resembles a father who would RUN for his son or daughter. It somewhat hit me that a father,who, without any thoughts of uncertainty would just do anything for his child. And then, my mind would wander off back to the story of The Prodigal Son. His father RAN as soon as he saw his son, in spite knowing all the wrongdoings that his son did. He freely accepted him into his arms.
I was thinking, 'man! If it was my father, even if I've done all that and one day, suddenly comes back, instead of running, he'll probably just stand there and give me good scolding.' Then again, I'll never know right? This world is mysterious and nothing is ever that predictable. And so, last night, I came to realise that my father, is in fact, a silent lover. One way or another, he do 'run' after me but in a different way. Ways that I'd never expect or would want but thats okay because all i know is that he did it for me. Most of the time, he'd lecture me about this and that but that's his way of showing that he cares. Therefore, indeed a silent lover he is. =)

SO, this Father's Day, hopefully all you out there make your daddies feel special and that he mean so much! Everyone has a daddy, even for those who may not have an earthly dad. You have, in fact, a Dad who, takes care of you every single minute of everyday...

♥ there is no need to weep for something that you may not have, for all the things you have now is only temporary. I am not saying that you should'nt not weep at all. Rather, I am saying that not all the things that you want may be yours. By saying this, probably someone else needs that something more than you do ♥

i know you may not read this but

. . . Happy Father's Day, Daddy!

less than 21 days

There is a true story of a little boy whose sister needed a blood tranfusion. The doctor explained that she had the same disease the boy had recovered from two years earlier. Her only chance of recovery was a transfusion from someone who had previously conquered the disease.
Since the two children had the same rare blood type, the boy was an ideal donor.
"would you give your blood to Mary?" the doctor asked.

Johny hesitated. His lower lips starts to tremble. Then he smiled and said, "Sure, for my sister."
Soon the two siblings were wheeled into the hospital room. As the nurse inserted the needle into his arm, Johny's smile faded. He watched the blood flow through the tube.
With the ordeal almost over, Johny's voice, slightly shaky, broke the silence.

"Doctor, when do i die?"
Only then did the doctor realize why Johny had hesitated, why his lips trembled when he agreed to donate his blood. He thought giving his blood to his sister would mean giving up his life. Perhaps, in that brief moment, that little boy has made a great decision indeed.

-this was soo touching that I actually shed few drops of tears while reading it from a book. Even worse my mum saw it and laughed at me. Nevertheless, this story showed me a great sacrifice that a lil boy is willing to make for his younger sister. And that, is a pure, unconditional love.

♥

less than 21 days~ O.o
iamgonnaplay,study,sleep,grow,eat...
Jim brickman, you're my number one pianist that i love listening to !

win or lose? WE had FUN!

Bl drama 2010...[February]

'...i don't think we can win this year... without the seniors.'

'oh no.... how are we going to write our script this year??'

' Ms.Lydia: Well, what kind of fairytales,stories or movies you all love to read or watch?'

'Abel: OH OH! i know! how about rumplestiltskin gone BAD?'

'. . . .OR the lord of the flies?'
...........





(26th March, mbks)
WE WON!!! gosh..we're so greedy to have won all the categories. Then again, I guess the greatest achievement was winning the best script because our script was written by ourselves and of course, ideas and help from our GORGEOUS teachers.
However, there were some of us who weren't too keen on winning because of SPM this year...which includes me

After the competition, we all kinda released 'pressure-ness and stress' by playing at the playground.. xD such kiddies....








hmmmm....
I can still remember the time, not long ago when we all first had the idea of writing the script..gosh.. at BING! with Abel, Yong Han, lappy and fooodd...

'ain't no mountain high enough....' (:

doomsweek aint that doom doom after all

SOOoooo done with EXAMS!

Now me want THIS! >>>>

............hopefully!

HAH! then again, finishing an exam also means, I'd have to prepare myself for another one...

*takes a deep breath*
....i'll get through it.....i always do.. =)
Gosh. I JUST can't help but think I did not do my best for my physics! >.<
Lesson learned : NEVER EVER study at the last minute! In fact, NEVER do it for anything! or it might be too late to even do it...

In some cases, you just have no choice but to do that... Nonetheless, try AVOID it. It really tears you down especially with the load of other subjects lined up as well. Not to mention the really tiring and sleepy eyes that i'm suffering from right now.

i want to go through spm but not form 5

it's only six more months to go.oh noooo...
Ahh well, i'll collect as many precious moments and carved it all in here *points to my heart*

Tata.

I wish you'd understand,

Perfection would never be in your hand.

Sometimes you'd think you want the best,

The best, would disappoint you nevertheless.

I,myself am stitched together with faults and failures and imperfections,
Only with good intentions.

(credits to Eric's blog on reality)

where did i go wrong?

Tonight's youth gathering, I missed it. =( Then again, it was a thanksgiving thing for ER2010. (OH! ER was great! I enjoyed the whole night standing alone as in without friends around me but somehow it did not feel like I was. Dodo said it'll be worth to worship Him alone. In fact, it did~!)
Well, i did my own little 'gathering' tonight with myself and Him. It was not much but i'm happy. Not to mention, my music ministry was my laptop. There may not be fancy things like proper music to worship but who says thats gonna stop me? After all, praise and worship can be anywhere,anytime. hee...
It's a month of rosary now. And well, i'm trying to say my own each day(if i do try).

So, what's with my headline? I guess, lately my head is filled with so much stuff, good and bad. Either way, according to daddy in Heaven, it's all worth it....EVERY LITTLE THING is worth it. For example, if you see someone and smile, won't that person think, 'Oo...she's friendly.' or if you see someone and not smile at all, won't that person think,'Gosh, she looks scary!'
To me, there is a difference there, whether to smile or not. It's up to each one's choice. So, lately, i'm just thinking where did i went wrong in all that i did and why things happen the way it did.
As I was thinking, something came to mind and cheered me up a little...

'Sometimes, things just don't go the way you plan because I have already planned it out for you. So,my dear... this is just the first part of it. hold on.. Just wait. I want to show you something more than anything you can ever imagine. Hold on........ Ready? Now, hold my hands as tight as you can, make sure you don't let go, and I want you to run after me.......'

my thoughts : 'But where will we go..? and sigh....how long must I wait??'

'*smiles* Somewhere far.......Be patient, Just hold my hands tight and follow. No matter how far, take a deep breath and lets go!'

Anyway, this two weeks is EXAMSSSSS!! goodness. Hopefully i'll go through it just fine. I know i will. heeee....




I felt so...assured after watching this.ehehe...

til next post~
TaTa!

♥ I'll hold on.
(:

27042008

At this exact day,
You left us two years ago,
So much has changed since then,
(wish i could still have one more chance to say 'I love you.')
Despite that, i know...we all know, you'll always stay in our hearts.
Gosh , how i remembered when i used to hate it that you always call each of us to massage your back and now we can't anymore.

~ All the grownful things, separation brings
you never let me know it, you never let it show it..
because you loved me and obviously,
There's so much more left to say,
If you were with me today, face to face ~

dear Grandpa...
27.04.10

Everything doesn't last forever
except memories


Memories are like smudged ink that just won't fade away.

it's gonna be MAY soon!

MAY! in like few more days. [byee April 2010!] good news or bad news? DEPENDS on how you see it. (:
for me, mainly bad.... why? nearer to spm!! >.< for some others, starting college? or maybe getting promoted? or performing in a concert? ...etc. Heck, its just starting a new month but there's so much going on.


Class photoshoot. i look funnnyyyy. in the bus, jocelyn and i were super thirsty and the drink that we were drinking from was our friends' . eheh. desperateness.

after mid term exam, i shall jump like my friend, Edward here.

Somehow, this picture make us look like birds. :)



At the end of the day, we'll all miss our high school moments. Every little things that we do become memories and shall forever be there, whether we like it or not.

TaTa~